Deception Tips Video 99 — Agree With Liars
Hey guys, my name is Spencer Coffman, thank you for watching the Deception Tips videos. They’re all about teaching you how to read people and detect deception so that you will be able to tell if someone is lying to you. Today, we are going to talk about a great tip that is something that you need to keep in mind and be aware of when you’re reading people and detecting deception.
It’s something that we may have talked about before, we’ve talked about it in a few other tips and we’ll recap on them. So, here it is, this is Deception Tip number 99. It can be helpful to agree with liars on little things. If they think they fooled you, they may let their guard down. We’ve talked about this before in getting some facts wrong or Wrong Facts and you can see that in the card above.
It’s important sometimes to agree with liars and allow them to think that they may have fooled you. If they think they fooled you, they may let their guard down like oh man, I’m getting away with this, this is way easier than I thought, this is going to be a piece of cake, let me just keep going. All of a sudden, they may just start spilling the truth like crazy.
One important thing is to not let yourself get overconfident and we’ve talked about that before, you’ll see another card come up, don’t get overconfident in this ability. If you start to agree with the liar on certain points and they are like oh yeah, I’ve got this. They start to let their guard down and you notice that and you’re like yes, I’ve got them right where I want them, they let their guard down, I’m going to walk all over them.
Don’t get overconfident because as soon as you think you have it in the bag, you’re going to lose it, you’re going to mess it up and you’ll fail. So, remain calm, remain humble, stay there, do not become overconfident. One thing to look for though is when you start to get some facts that are wrong, we talked about it, like with their name and it frustrates them.
Maybe you start to agree with them on certain points that you know are false to let them continue with their lie. They start to get a little cocky, watch for, remember we talked about this before, contempt. We talked about this in Deception Tip number 19, if you start to see contempt then you know you’ve really got them where you want them.
They have that contempt, they think you’re an idiot, they think you’re a fool, they think they’re smarter than you, you can use that big-time to your advantage. Now you can start asking them other questions and go a little deeper and push them. All of a sudden, it’s like, oh, you came out of the left field, you gave him a hook, you threw him a curveball, whatever analogy you want to use because they weren’t expecting that.
They thought they were talking to a dimwit and all of a sudden, you’ve just laid it on them and showed them that no, you really did know what was going on, you were paying attention and you read their body language. They didn’t even know it because they thought you didn’t know what was going on, remember that they may always push to get more.
If you’re starting to agree with some of the lies that they’re saying to get them to talk more, they might start to push that lie a little further. For example, maybe you are trying to figure out where someone went and they said, “Oh, I went to Texas.” “Okay, Texas, wow, I’ve never been there, have you?” They say, “No”, oh wait a minute, and they messed up.
You agreed with something, you said, oh okay, I’ve never been to Texas, you didn’t even contradict that point. You didn’t say well, I know you weren’t in Texas because it’s ten hours from here, you didn’t even contradict it, you just said, oh, I’ve never been there, have you? Maybe you’ve been there, maybe you haven’t, you just didn’t negate that point, you moved right on and turned it into a question so quickly that they didn’t even know what you’re doing.
All of a sudden, they’ve admitted to not being in Texas. You can do things like that with any scenario just keep in mind that if you agree with certain points, you don’t have to verbally agree with them like oh, so you were in Texas, that’s great, it must have been awesome there. You don’t need to do that, you can just let it go, look over it and then circle back with a question that gets them to deny that.
Oftentimes, when you move quickly and smoothly like that, they aren’t even going to know what’s happening and they will admit to it or fess up or contradict themselves. This allows you to just say hey, you messed up, I just caught you in this lie, what do you want to say now? They can either tell you the truth or they’ll keep lying, sometimes they may push for more to see how much they can get away with. Other times, they may tell you the truth right then and there, so use this tactic to your advantage.
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Until next time.